A Citizen's Rebuttal

Dear American Leadership,

Sorry it took a few days to formulate a rebuttal. I had to go to work. You see, when my co-workers and I have an issue or a disagreement, we have to work it out, compromise and move forward. There is no “shutdown” option.  

Mr. President, I appreciate how you addressed the nation about a topic you feel strongly about. I admire your conviction and determination. Yet, I’m afraid that you are misguided. I’m not sure if you believe the things you say or if you have some ulterior motive. You have done a good job keeping us guessing. Congratulations on that, If that was even your plan. However, one thing is for certain: You have conjured up an immediate and pressing crisis on an issue that has been long standing. An analogy I would like to use is “water in the basement.” I’m not sure if you’ve ever dealt with this but to us regular Americans, this is a common occurrence. Basements take in water. Illegal immigration is much like “water in basement.” It’s always been there. We know about it. We try to fix it but sure enough when spring comes, it’s back. Statistics show that illegal immigration is steady or on the decline. So, why are you hooting and hollering about a flood in the basement? We know that there is “water in the basement.” We want to fix it but you need to stop B.S.ing us about the severity of the issue.

Look, we may watch too much football (NFL ratings are up BTW) and drink way too much beer, but we’re not as stupid as you think we are. Many of us work with data everyday. I’m not sure what you think we do for a living but it is 2019. We know the difference between anecdotal evidence and quantifiable data. For example, I’m a high school teacher. If Jose (I used this name just to piss you off) does poorly on the SAT, that is bad for Jose but that does not indicate a trend. In fact, if most of the school stayed the same or improved, then Jose’s scores seem to be a Jose problem. It wouldn’t make sense to for the school to sound the alarm and switch gears with its curriculum, would it? This is exactly what you are doing and it does not make sense. The anecdotal stories you tell about crimes committed by Illegal immigrants are sad, yes, but unfortunately American-on-American crime is much more prevalent. I can tell you thousands of sad stories about Americans killing Americans but what good would that do? Using anecdotal evidence to support your claim is “bush league” data analytics. Workers from the retail field to education, from the medical field to business know this. So please, just stop.

Congress. I’m going to quote a Toby Keith song if I may. What we need from you is “a little less talk and a lot more action.” When we go to work, we actually have to get stuff done. We serve you lunch, we teach your kids, we transport you from place to place, we protect you. You’re welcome. We get up every morning and we do these things. Why? Because we are hard working Americans and that’s our job. Do yours! Stop bitching and threatening each other and start getting stuff done. I don’t want to see you dancing outside of your office or mouthing off in a bar while you’re getting paid six figures. Meanwhile, TSA employees are being guilted into working without a paycheck because their jobs are “essential.” Are your jobs “essential”? Here’s an idea, instead of making speeches and posting crap on social media, you trade your salaries with them until you guys get your job done. Sounds fair to me. At least they are actually working.  

There are over 325 million of us. Stop trying to scare us, divide us, confuse us and use us for your own political gain. We are not as dumb as you think we are and we are running out of patience. Get it together! Mr. President, declare your emergency already if that’s your plan. Congress, be ready. What are you going to do when the president skirts your authority? No more speeches or social media posts. Put some real skin in the game. End the shutdown. If you don’t, maybe we’ll just have to do a little “shutdown” of our own.

-The People